Bitch Slap (2009)
By: Rip on June 2, 2010  | 
Momentum Pictures | Region 2, PAL | 2:35:1 (16:9 enhanced) | English DD 5.1 | 101 minutes (Full Specs)
The Movie
Cover Art
Director: Rick Jacobson
Starring: Julia Voth, Erin Cummings, America Olivo, Michael Hurst, Ron Melendez
Screenplay: Rick Jacobson, Eric Gruendemann
Country: USA
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Okay folks, Bitch Slap is a tough one to write about because it isn't great. In fact, it's rather bad. But, it's supposed to be bad, so you're either going to love it or hate it. Anyway, here goes…

Three incredibly sexy women with very large breasts (Trixie the stripper, Hel the thief and corporate powerbroker, and Camero the psychotic ex-con drug-runner) embark on a mission to find buried treasure that belongs to a rather nasty British gangster. This leads them to a location in the desert where they encounter all manner of foe, including a punk rocker with Tourettes Syndrome, a Japanese schoolgirl with a razor sharp yo-yo, midgets with machine guns, etc, and then ultimately, each other. But what exactly is this treasure that they seek? What secrets are the girls keeping from each other? And who exactly is the shady character played by Kevin Sorbo of television's Hercules fame?

If you can figure all that out and more, whilst trying to make sense of the interminably convoluted plot, you're one up on me! Everything but the kitchen sink is thrown in here, and there are some occasionally funny one-liners, but let's face it, this flick ain't about the story. It's about the ride. This very energetic film opens with some groovy graphics that include a montage of footage from Betty Page movies, Russ Meyer's Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!, etc, so you get the picture of where this is all going. It's basically a homage to those old films, but spruced up with gore, gunplay, brawls (choreographed by Zoe Bell), lesbian sex, nuns and big bazookas (?). Many have complained about the lack of nudity in this film, but it's pretty darn sexy, and after all, not all those old exploitation flicks offered nude scenes (though it certainly would have been an added attraction here). But the three leads, played by the beautiful Julia Voth, the brassy Erin Cummings and the super sexy America Olivo, are lovely to look at and the camera constantly lingers on their bodies. The fact that they can't act to save their lives doesn't really matter in this instance (Olivo is particularly awful), as it just adds to the cheesy humor on display, and really shouldn't be the reason why you're watching this movie in the first place. Guest players such as British actor Michael Hurst, Kevin Sorbo and Lucy Lawless (playing a nun!), do well though, with tongue firmly planted in cheek.

Technically, Bitch Slap is pretty good. The cinematography is slick, though there is some obvious CGI and green screen use here, but that only adds to the overall cartoon style of the film. And that's what this film most reminded me of: a cartoon. A rocking soundtrack is also featured and it's actually one of the best things about the whole movie. In the end, this is drive-in fare and very much a case of style over substance. Interestingly, director Rick Jacobson is actually a protégé of the drive-in king himself, Roger Corman, having worked for the great man on films like Dragon Fire, Blackbelt, Baby Blood 2, etc, and when it comes to the style-over-substance aspect, he was a regular director on television series' such as Baywatch, Xena, Hercules (which may explain the involvement of Lawless & Sorbo), etc. In Bitch Slap Jacobson keeps things moving along at such a pace that you'll be having too much fun to notice or care just how bad this movie really is. Either that or you'll just switch it off after ten minutes and watch something else.
This film has yet to be released on dvd in R4, but this UK R2 PAL transfer looks just lovely and is framed in 2:35:1 anamorphic widescreen. Colors are bright and there's no aliasing or edge enhancement in sight. Quite the visual treat.
A big, loud 5.1 surround mix. Good separation with lots of bass for all the gunfire, explosions and groovy music. Surrounds are used to great effect too, what with the amount of bullets flying around, etc. You'll be ducking for cover if you crank this up on a decent sound system.
Extra Features
The R1 edition of this title features two separate commentaries, but you don't get those with this R2 version. What you do get however is something even better; a feature length documentary entitled, Behind Bitch Slap: Building a Better B-Movie. The whole thing clocks in at roughly 94 minutes and is actually more interesting than the film itself! A really great extra. The film's trailer is also included.
The Verdict
Movie Score
Disc Score
Overall Score
Whilst it's a little overlong (it could have been shorn of 15 minutes or more) and basically pretty bad, if you remember to not take it seriously, Bitch Slap is a fun homage/parody of exploitation movies from the 50's, 60's & 70's and a real night out with some beer and pizza. In terms of A/V specs, the dvd is terrific and the feature length documentary is a great bonus. For fans of girls with guns, big boobs and lots of cheese, it's a dream. Others should probably steer clear. And just remember to read the disclaimer as the end credits roll.

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