Bedroom Mazurka (1970)
By: Paul Ryan on March 17, 2009  | 
Beyond (Australia). All Regions, PAL. 1.78:1 (16:9 enhanced). English DD 2.0. 90 minutes
The Movie
Cover Art
Director: John Hillbard
Starring: Ole Søltoff, Birthe Tove, Anne Birgit Garde, Anne Grete
Screenplay: Bob Ramsing
Country: Denmark
External Links
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Max Mikkelsen (Ole Soltoff) is a well-liked, if somewhat nerdish, teacher at the Krabbesogaard (or Crab Grass) Boys School, where the core subjects appear to be choral singing, skylarking, and learning to dance the mazurka. When the school's Dean announces that he is leaving his job to take a government ministry, Mikkelsen is put forward as a possible replacement. The only stumbling block is that the sweet, polite Mikklesen doesn't have a wife, let alone a girlfriend. In fact, it's pretty apparent to all and sundry – even the students – that Max is a virgin. As he has pledged to open the school up to female enrolments if he becomes Dean, Mikkelsen's students band together to do whatever it takes to get him put in office. And what it takes consists of getting their meek science master laid. And there's a long list of women (including the Dean's sexually-frustrated wife, the two very different daughters of the school Governor, and a specially-enlisted stripper) only too willing to help out…

Amusing mainly in its quaintness and very late-sixties mentality, Bedroom Mazurka is one of those films you frequently spotted in the Adult section of video stores in the 80's, but is for the most part, fairly tame. Adapted from a best-selling novel (apparently), this is silly and entirely forgettable, but generally pleasant as this kind of Euro-smut goes. Most of the "comedy" is of the dodgy slapstick variety (including Mikkelsen falling face-first into a woman's crotch), but it's competently directed and performed with gusto. The sex stuff primarily consists of half-to-fully-nude women throwing themselves at the hapless Mikkelsen, though there is also one brief – not to mention surprising for the era - inclusion of a hardcore sex photo, which would really be the only reason this has been slapped with an R18+, as the rest is worthy of an M15+ at best.

There are some moments of sexism that you would expect from the era, but also an unfunny – and by today's standards, pretty tasteless – subplot involving one female character who accuses Max of raping her after he rebuffs her advances. It's brief, but still casts a pall over the film. Another problem is that Bedroom Mazurka comes to DVD in an English-dubbed version, rather than the original Danish audio. Sure, one might question the point of watching a film like this with subtitles, but the dubbing isn't just technically poor, but also inconsistent, with some characters given American voices, others British, and the rest indeterminate middle-European accents. One of the schoolboys sounds like he's been dubbed by Dr Strangelove!
Surprisingly for a nearly 40-year-old European sex comedy, Bedroom Mazurka is (despite being labeled on the cover as pan and scan) presented in 16x9-enhanced anamorphic widescreen. Though overly dark in places, this is a fine video transfer and looks like it has been recently restored, as there's nary a blemish or speck to be found.
With such a good video transfer it's a shame that this disc comes only with dubbed English audio. Whilst the general sound quality of this 2.0 Dolby track is quite serviceable, the decision to go with the English dub – especially odd given that the credits are presented in Danish – makes this a missed opportunity. As such audio sync is a very obvious problem throughout.
Extra Features
Original Theatrical Trailer (3.16m, 16x9): An amusingly tacky little trailer, introduced by Ole Søltoff out of character (though dubbed, as in the feature), this promises a film for anyone who "likes sex and humour", in "full erotic colour". Yep, all bases covered then.

Bonus Erotic Trailers:
Or trailer as the case may be, as all that you get is a single preview of Gwendoline (2.11m, 16x9) which is also available from Beyond.
The Verdict
Like a Porky's film with an accordion soundtrack and costumes by Austin Powers, Bedroom Mazurka is dated as all get-out, not to mention troublingly misogynistic at times. The DVD is serviceable, but marred greatly by the omission of the original Danish audio.
Movie Score
Disc Score
Overall Score

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