Porn of the Dead (2006)
By: Devon B. on November 24, 2008  | 
Loaded (USA). All Regions, NTSC. 1.85:1 (Non-anamorphic). English DD 2.0. 101 minutes
The Movie
Director: Rob Rotten
Starring: Johnny Thrust, Joey Ray, Buster Good, Trent Tesoro, Alec Knight, Dirty Harry, Nikki Jett, Ruby, Jenner, Trina Michaels, Hillary Scott, Sierra Sinn
Country: USA
External Links
Purchase IMDB YouTube
In a world where the dead still walk…nah, I'm just kidding, there's not really any plot in Porn of the Dead. What we have are five scenes about people having sex with zombies.

The first scene, which is also the scene that comes the closest to having a story, involves the Vet from Texas Asshole Massacre picking up a zombie girl on the street. He takes her back to his place and fucks her. After he's shot his load, it becomes clear the girl is still hungry for cock. The second scene is about a girl who masturbates, then dreams of having it off with a zombie guy, who luckily has rigor mortis in the right area. The next scene involves some zombies attacking a porn shoot. The scene they interrupt is clearly a dig at a competing porn studio, but I'm not sure who because the studio's name is beeped out. Anyway, the three zombies attack, kill off the guys on the set, then do it with the female star. The fourth scene is about a mortician who seems to have a tattoo on his dick. That's some insane dedication to skin ink! Anyway, he gets all re-animated with a woman that's been brought in. And finally, in what I think is supposed to be an asylum, a guy has sex with a zombie girl but it's her that gets to know him inside and out.

If you're after a porno with a story or a unique twist, this probably isn't gonna meet your needs. There is no story and the unique bit about the zombies, well, they don't really look like zombies. The zombie makeup just looks like greasepaint and dirt, and at first I thought the zombie wasn't one of the zombies at all. The makeup actually degenerates as the film goes along, getting less elaborate all the time. The zombie plague also appears to spread by any sort of contact…or else the makeup was rubbing off on the sexual partners. Anyway, by the end of a scene, the makeup is generally rubbed or sweated off. Aside from a few cheap gore FX, there's not much to recommend Porn of the Dead on for zombie enthusiasts.

There is, however, some things of worth in the movie. While I found the zombie makeup distracting and annoying on the women, when it's on the men, I hardly even noticed it. I mean, who's watching the guys' faces, anyway? For me, that meant there were two scenes that I could view as just straight porn. It may be a no go as a horror film, but at least it's 2/5 watchable as a porn.
Porn of the Dead has been grindhoused, so it's made to look like an old and dirty print. Specks, flicker, and grain have also been added. Except in the third scene, which is much clearer for some reason. I can only assume the film looks how it's supposed to, but a video grading is a moot point.
It might be the appropriate genre to include in such a film, but I found the death metal score distracting. The sound is fine for what it is when the music does stop.
Extra Features
The DVD comes with a 48 minute making of hosted by a camerman who sounds like John Goodman and isn't funny at all, but thinks he is. Actually, maybe it was Goodman. He wanders around the set being an idiot, searching for missing performers and conducting interviews as makeup is being applied. There is a porn as art discussion, but it isn't very highbrow. The disc also has cum shot clips, a slideshow, ads for phone sex, and trailers for Black Trash 2, Bottomless 5, and Big and Bouncy 2.
The Verdict
Horror fans will still be better off sticking with Romero or Fulci. Raincoaters will still be better off sticking with one of the millions of alternatives. Necrophiles will still be better off sticking with Nekromantik.
Movie Score
Disc Score
Overall Score

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