Cover Art

Credits

Director: Conrad Glover Starring: Conrad Glover, Ron Douglass, Raine Brown, Christopher Farmer, Nicholl Jones Screenplay: Conrad Glover Music: Brian DuFord Tagline: Where predators become prey Country: USA

A trio of stupid criminal wannabe's decide to kidnap the daughter of a rich dude along with her friend from a nightclub and take them to The Woods of Evil in an attempt to make it rich quick. These three idiot non-talented dudes take our helpless non-talented victims to a cabin, tie 'em up, and have needless conversations with them rather than sex for about 84 minutes and that's about it. Oh, and a psycho with a big knife shows up at some point. Yes, someone or something is killing people who happen to venture into The Woods of Evil...

Now this is the Unrated Directors Cut, with Dolby Digital 5.1 sound which usually means there's more to see and hear, but I don't think it's going to make much difference with this movie. The Unrated Directors Cut is goreless with the exception of a poorly executed head smushing scene, so I would have rather watched the standard version to get through the movie quicker.

No originality goes into the creation of the protagonist, who is wearing a tweed hooded jacket and looks like a heavyweight boxer or a wrestler or a fat person out jogging and doing his or her daily exercises. This guy moves so slow a snail would get to the finish line first, so any of the other characters would only need to walk at a fast pace to get miles ahead of him. But no, they just fall over and crawl away. Our victims have a gun so a few shots to the head would finish the killer off, but the gun is merely used to wave insects away. There's no reason for our killer to be out in the park, I mean the woods, stalking and killing other than for the sake of killing time. No tortured childhood, no psychological illness, no revenge to bestow, no evil forces at work here... so why is this guy so pissed off? Maybe it's his parents? No insight or profile is given whatsoever for our psycho. The kills are also unoriginal and uneventful. Remember, a faceful of blood does not a memorable gore moment make. Nobody took the effort to find any genuinely creepy locations to help with the mood of the film either. A good location is half the hard work out of the way. I mean the location seems so aesthetically pleasing that it's hard to believe that something evil lurks there and oh, are those houses I see in the background? The only part of the movie that the Art department decided to set dress is done rather sloppily and with no apparent effort whatsoever. There is a clearing in the park, I mean forest, where there are impaled skulls on stakes, probably to indicate that this is the killers stomping ground. It looks pretty lame and this is further enhanced when our 3 criminals unwittingly stumble across the clearing, and do you think that they can see any of these staked skulls? "Hey dude, look by your feet and to your left and right and in front of you! The skulls, the plastic skulls, look at all the pretty plastic skulls!" Oh hell, just ignore them!

Only other Trailers here. I got a kick out of the Trailers because they are the best part of the whole DVD. It looks like they incorporate sex, nudity and lashings of gore in the rest of these offerings and they certainly look a helluva lot more engaging.