I, like most boys growing up, had an obsession
with dinosaurs. I'm pretty sure mine was
a little deeper than most, as just about everything
I owned at the time had something to do with dinosaurs,
no matter how slight. Because of this deep rooted
obsession with prehistoric monsters, there was
a noticeable theme running through the videos
we would rent each week. There were four main
ones I remember very clearly renting in constant
and varying rotations, those being Godzilla
1985, 1922's The Lost World,
King Kong and One Million
Years B.C. There were countless others,
but these were the constants, and when I finally
obtained One Million Years B.C.,
my inner child came running back (propelled by
his favourite red and white dinosaur sneakers)
like never before.
Back then, One Million Years B.C.
was all about the dinosaurs. The story was easy
enough to sit through, as it wasn't ever
hampered by pointless banter between the prehistoric
humans that my three-to-six year old brain would
likely discard anyway. On the contrary, the only
words spoken were mono or duo syllabic grunts
and the occasional "Tumak" or "Loana"
(being the names of the film's hero and
heroine respectively), so there wasn't really
too much to take in. But I digress, back then,
it was all about dinosaurs. Big, stonking, Ray
Harryhausen dinosaurs (plus an iguana with a fin
stuck to its back), and One Million Years
B.C. had plenty to keep this kid extremely
happy.
Nowadays, One Million Years B.C.
is still all about the dinosaurs. When you watch
it as a kid you get totally caught up in the high
fantasy unravelling on screen, even if you knew
your dinosaurs well enough to realize that humans
and dinosaurs never co-existed. When you watch
it as an adult, you know this fact. You can also
distinguish good acting from bad acting, terrible
scripts from good ones, special effects and film
making techniques, all that sort of stuff that
makes film critics deserving of murder and you
decide what's worth watching and what's
not. And if One Million Years B.C.
weren't such an unbridled, tour de force
dinosaur-effects fantasy, it would certainly be
joining the ranks of Doug McClure's The
Land That Time Forgot as one of The Dinosaur
Films Time Forgot.
One Million Years B.C. gives
viewers the option to pay attention to Tumak (John
Richardson), a caveman cast out from his savage
tribe who, after wandering for several days through
the badlands, comes across a more civilized coastal
tribe. Here we meet Loana (Raquel Welch), daughter
of the coastal tribe's chief, who nurses
Tumak back to health. Jealousy arises between
Loana's betrothed and Tumak, resulting in
a confrontation that gets Tumak sent away once
again, only this time Loana joins him. Tumak returns
with Loana to his people, and overthrows his savage
father as head of the tribe, but his own brother
begins to plot against him.
It might sound a little over theatrical, probably
because as a story, it is, but when it's
played out entirely through expressive grunts,
body language and hilarious facial expressions,
it's pretty easy to buy into. But who cares,
right? There are dinosaurs here! Ray Harryhausen
dinosaurs! There's also a plethora of Playboy
Playmates in very small, furry bikinis! Harryhausen
was always the best at his game. No one mastered
Stop Motion animation like Harryhausen. The countless
monster movies throughout the Fifties and Sixties,
even on through the Seventies to the Eighties,
meant that no one could come close to the expertise
this man carried. This was the man that gave us
the classic living statue of Kali, in The
Golden Voyage of Sinbad, the multi-headed
Hydra and the army of Skeleton warriors in Jason
and the Argonauts.
Watching this film (and any of his other films)
on VHS, where the image quality was significantly
lower, possibly damaged or stretched, made buying
into the effects easy (so did the fact that I
was considerably younger). But watching them on
DVD made me realize how truly spectacular the
effects were for their time. For 1966, the dinosaurs
are incredibly well animated and interact with
the world around them flawlessly (exception being
the iguana). One sequence involving an Allosaurus
attacking the coastal tribe's village is
particularly impressive, especially when the village's
men come to fend off the beast. Another sequence
involving a Pteranodon is a treat for the eyes,
and you really can't go past the fight between
a Styracosaurus and a Ceratosaurus. The dinosaur
names might be lost on you, but the sequences
really are spectacular. |