Credits

Director: Antony Balch Starring: Michael Gough, Robin Askwith, Vanessa Shaw, Ellen Pollock, Dennis Price Screenplay: Antony Balch Country: UK

Following his forced retirement from an appalling rock band, Jason (Robin Askwith) decides to take a "Hairy Holiday" to Brittlehouse Manor, a health farm run by the leather-gloved, ex-Nazi scientist Dr. Storm (Michael Gough, always a pleasure to watch). En route, Jason meets Judy (Vanessa Shaw), also on her way to Brittlehouse Manor to visit her aunt, a pursed-lipped old woman who married Dr. Storm some years ago. Once they arrive, the pair realise rather quickly that something is amis, their suspicions probably aroused by the labotomised condition of the other guests, the blood pouring from the taps or possibly just because the token midget (Skip Martin) keeps telling them to brush their teeth. Then there's this bit where a monster stands in a doorway and the soundtrack goes crazy.

Horror Hospital is genuinely funny in a droll, deadpan sort of way. It's refreshing to see a comedy-horror that isn't in the slightest bit self-referential or, God forbid, "ironic". The fact that the film's attempts at legitimate shock moments are so poorly handled that they elicited from me an audible, cloying "...awww..." is all the more reason to recommend it.

There are plenty of gems in this film to help to seal the deal, from the Rolls Royce that decapitates people through the use of retractable, side-mounted blades (the logistics of which I am still unable to fathom) right up to the seriously bad fight sequences (of which there are more than you'd expect). And, as I have already mentioned (complete with exclamation point) there's a putty-head monster that nearly had me weeping tears of joy.