Sickle (2005)
By: Michael Helms on August 18, 2005.
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| Peacock Films (Australia). Region 4, PAL. 4:3. English 2.0. 91 minutes |
| The Movie |
| Cover Art |
 |
| Credits |
Director: Paul Gagné
Starring: Paul Cagney,
Shaila Vaidya, Maurizio Farhad, Stacey Denson,
Vaedynn Orland
Screenplay: Paul Gagne'
Music: Robert Greiert
Tagline:Blood Will
Flow
Country: USA
AKA: The Slaughterhouse
Massacre |
A weak electronic heartbeat tries to pound
on the soundtrack as blood dripping titles throw
up the names of cast members you've never heard
of. They are names you know you'll never see again
and what's really strange is that you haven't
even seen the faces they belong too.
An intertitle tells us we're in Allen, Texas
circa 1993. A gal who was obviously enticed out
of the nearest strip club to be in a fillum leads
another actor (male) towards a slaughterhouse
to have sex (as you do in Allen, Texas...). The
steamed up gal bites her man and starts to masturbate
and they're not even through the door. Inside
there's a guy hanging up chicken bodies as he
chops them up. At the sight of the chicken carcasses
the gal gets really turned on and immediately
wants to fuck on the cold concrete floor next
to the chicken electrocution bath. The sound of
thunder rings out and a shadow appears in the
corridor. Our gal is already naked and right into
it as she places her now dirty butt on her man's
crotch. As he thrusts she looks up and screams.
Cut to Dallas College in the present day and
a class presided over by a third rate Paul Bartel
impersonator. While one gal comes onto the teacher
from her desk and a jealous classmate calls her
a slut the word is spread that there's a party
tonight. A drinking contest is going down inside
while obvious real life compatriots of our heroine
from the opening scene put on a lesbian show in
the back yard disgusting one dark haired female
party goer who storms off to bust a guy wanking
in the bathroom. A group form and begin to discuss
the fact that it's the 10th anniversary of the
Sickle killings. Legend has it that Marty Sickle,
diligent slaughterhouse worker was lynched for
committing a rape murder. This is the cue for
a flashback that adds some gory detail to the
opening sequence including Marty putting a sickle
in a guy's back but it getting stuck. Back in
the present the legend is also expanded to include
the story that if you go to the death house and
repeat a rhyme three times, Marty's spirit will
return from beyond the grave. Naturally, two couples,
and a stoner who tags along behind, decide to
go out to the old slaughterhouse and do some myth
busting. Reciting the rhyme by a spirit does indeed
turn up. The mayhem includes a crotch stabbing
followed by a poorly rendered body splitting and
even worse comic line, a slightly better body
halving, rolling heads, and chalk outline sex. |
| Video |
| Even if Sickle wasn't shot on
tape it looks like it; analogue tape at that, and
with less than minimal lighting and the bottom of
a dirty beer bottle for a camera lens. |
| Audio |
| Poorly recorded and processed sound at best. |
| Extra Features |
| None. |
| The Verdict |
| A few blatant idea thefts combined with rudimentary
knowledge of one aspect of the modern abattoir and
a camcorder don't add up here to filmmaking that
can be consumed on any level, even if the producers
did get a sale, their most amazing achievement with Sickle. Shelf filler of the lowest
order to be avoided at all costs. |
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